The Pursuit of the House-Boat

The


House-boat of the Associated Shades, formerly located upon the River


Styx, as the reader may possibly remember, had been torn from its


moorings and navigated out into unknown seas by that vengeful pirate


Captain Kidd, aided and abetted by some of the most ruffianly


inhabitants of Hades. Like a thief in the night had they come, and


for no better reason than that the Captain had been unanimously voted


a shade too shady to associate with self-respecting spirits had they


made off with the happy floating club-house of their betters; and


worst of all, with them, by force of circumstances over which they


had no control, had sailed also the fair Queen Elizabeth, the


spirited Xanthippe, and every other strong-minded and beautiful woman


of Erebean society, whereby the men thereof were rendered desolate.

"I


can't stand it!" cried Raleigh, desperately, as with his


accustomed grace he presided over a special meeting of the club,


called on the bank of the inky Stygian stream, at the point where the


missing boat had been moored. "Think of it, gentlemen, Elizabeth


of England, Calpurnia of Rome, Ophelia of Denmark, and every precious


jewel in our social diadem gone, vanished completely; and with whom?


Kidd, of all men in the universe! Kidd, the pirate, the ruffian—"

"Don't


take on so, my dear Sir Walter," said Socrates, cheerfully.


"What's the use of going into hysterics? You are not a woman,


and should eschew that luxury. Xanthippe is with them, and I'll


warrant you that when that cherished spouse of mine has recovered


from the effects of the sea, say the third day out, Kidd and his crew


will be walking the plank, and voluntarily at that."

"But


the House-boat itself," murmured Noah, sadly. "That was my


delight. It reminded me in some respects of the Ark."

"The


law of compensation enters in there, my dear Commodore,"


retorted Socrates. "For me, with Xanthippe abroad I do not need


a club to go to; I can stay at home and take my hemlock in peace and


straight. Xanthippe always compelled me to dilute it at the rate of


one quart of water to the finger."...